I tried to do a few things differently in 2025.
In particular, on the way to moments or things that make me uncomfortable.
(I don’t mean “times I am in physical danger”, of course.)
But earlier, I’m going to run in the direction of The things that my brain tell me: “This is uncomfortable, I don’t like this, avoid it at all costs.”
The e -mail that I am afraid of opening. The conversation I am scared. The question I am afraid of asking. The ability to be alone with my thoughts (yikes).
When I reach my phone or Netflix or PlayStation controller to prevent me from being bored or uncomfortable or sad or guilty …
I try to build some discipline to pause first.
To not avoid, distract or entertain myself from what really happens.
Not to run out or run away, Monty-Python style.
If I have the courage to sit there and really ask the question: “Why do I feel uncomfortable because of this?” There are valuable lessons to learn.
Lean in the inconvenience
Author Pema Chodron explains the following in her book When things fall apart:
“We consider discomfort in any form as bad news.
… feelings such as disappointment, shame, irritation, resentment, anger, jealousy and fear.
Instead of being bad news, these are actually very clear moments that teach us where we stop. “
These things can be incredible teachers if we give ourselves the space to learn.
But that is quite the question in 2025:
Thanks to the internet and our phones and delivery on the same day, we can hide every minute of every day for almost every uncomfortable feeling in our lives. We never have to get bored, we never have to feel ‘bad’, we never have to address the elephant in the room.
We can simply sweep, click, tap or unload to prevent all “bad” feelings.
We can hide from them with endless entertainment and comfort (even if it prevents us from getting what we really want).
Of course those bad feelings do not go away – they are still there, and the things we avoid will eventually have to be treated.
If I try to hide for discomfort, I know I don’t really avoid it. I don’t keep it in the frame.
I am Caught in Pandora’s box with the samples.
Blaise Pascal, a 17th-century philosopher, said it best:
“All problems of humanity stem from the inability of man to sit quietly in a room.”
These feelings try to teach us!
Many feelings of inconvenience shout to teach us something if we can reformulate how we think about it.
As Chodron indicates:
“They are like messengers who show us with frightening clarity, Exactly where we are stuck.
This moment is the perfect teacher, and, luckily for us, it is with us wherever we are. “
Life has a way to make that Calm, uncomfortable feeling Get louder and louder until we can’t help it, but tackle it …
But we can save ourselves a lot of time when we recognize the fear, rather lean and acknowledge that life tries to teach us something.
That is my challenge for you this week.
What if …
We Let us get bored?
We asked: ‘I am Real Hungry, or do I just calm myself with food? ‘
We acknowledged that we were afraid or anxious or nervous and then asked (with compassionate curiosity) what was behind the feeling?
Life tries to teach us lessons every day.
We just have to be brave enough to be uncomfortable to see it.
-Steve